The big day is almost upon us. For seven weeks we have been counting down (or up) in anticipation of something truly momentous. Invitations have gone out. Everyone is dressing their best. Finally, the stage is set. No, I am not referring to the latest celebrity wedding. I am referring to the wedding at Sinai, where we commemorate the anniversary of G-d giving us the Torah. On Shabuot, G-d entered into a covenant with the Jewish People. Sinai was the huppah, the Torah was the ketubah, and we were all standing together to hear the Ten Commandments straight from G-d. This is the beautiful moment that we remember on Shabuot.
Now, as any married couple will tell you, the wedding is just one day. A marriage is everything that comes after. The flowers fade, the music stops, the guests go home, and what you are left with is each other. Every day you make a choice to show up, to give, to work at it. Relationships do not run on autopilot. They require effort, attention, and intention. Our relationship with G-d and the Torah is no different. After all, the very first night, we stay up learning the Torah, reviewing, not even affording ourselves sleep, in an effort to keep what is most precious, the Torah, in our minds and in our hearts. The Torah is not a one time memory but rather an ongoing commitment to better ourselves in our relationship with G-d.
Still, we could ask a very pointed question. We see in the Torah itself, G-d basically threatened the Jewish People and literally held a mountain over them, stating that they accept the Torah (Shemot 19:17). The Gemara (Shabbat 88a) states that if they accepted, G-d would allow them to live but if not, G-d would drop the mountain on them. Certainly this now appears to be a forced marriage instead of a couple entering so willingly. What do we make of this?
While there are many answers given, the Maharal explains that G-d forced the Jewish People to receive the Torah. Of course it was praiseworthy that they had already shown their love for G-d and His Torah by declaring that they would willingly accept it (Shemot 24:17). Still, G-d wanted to emphasize that without the Torah, the creation of the world was for nothing. To show this necessity, G-d gave the Torah to the Jewish People “by force.” In their defense, they had already accepted it unofficially. Still, now G-d needed to make certain that there was no backing out.
The Torah is compared to life itself (Mishlei 3:18), and in other places to water (Baba Kamma 17a). We know we cannot live long without water. The Torah is the same way. From complex halachic questions to simple everyday moral decisions, it is present in all of our lives whether you are a scholar or not. With every marriage the effort must be put in, and our relationship with the Torah is no different. It is not simply a book of laws, it is our way of life. When we show up with the right intentions, with love and devotion, G-d will return that same love and devotion to us, many times over.